brigadaaah!

this is gonna be a quick post coz it's 2am and i have 7am classes tomorrow. lol. anyway, i saw brigada today in up sunken garden playing, practising for a gig maybe or just plain having fun. i saw jorel and podge and everybody else behind a tree. yes, i was watching from behind a tree! i'm soo pathetic, i felt like a loser for a whole 15-minute span! whoah that's a lot! i couldn't just barge in as easy as what was on my mind, in fact i literally froze my ass off when i saw them. loser! loser! loser! anyway, whatever, next time. when i get my guts straight. amp. :)

amen

i saw this uh, thing, it's a manifesto! duh? it's a public declaration of uh, i have no idea of what i'm talking about. i think it's a hello- world -it's -time -to- make -a -change deal kind of manifesto. all i know is, this was written by jourdan 'the dreamer' sebastian (a film director, actor, philosopher, producer etc) who i recently found out is who the story 'elegie' is about. in the movie, he is a rockstar who has a brother who's a virtuoso pianist/player (i'm not sure). manic. depressive. bipolar. uhh. headache. there's this love triangle among him, his brother (played by marc abaya) and a leading lady. so yeah, there.

anyway, i copy-pasted this manifesto from sebastian's multiply site because i seriously feel that it's an inspiration. although he may have written this for less than 5 minutes maybe, i don't care. i t has so much content and uplifting vigor in it that i had to repost it here. i'd like to say thank you to marc abaya because i wouldn't know this wonderful writer, actor, director etc. had i not obsessed over the trailer that marc was on. thanks marc. moving on, here's the manifesto. yey.


Dreamer's Manifesto

I, _________________, choose to live a life of adventure, excitement, service, joy, spontaneity and love. I choose to love. And as I love I live. As I live I give. As I give I serve. As I serve I step closer to the reality of my dreams. I will dream. I will dream big and amazing and spectacular and awesome dreams.

I will live my dreams and not compromise for the sake of security or safety or comfort. I will jump-out of my comfort zone and embrace change. Change, whom I fear. Change, whom I dread. I will seek to live beyond what I can, believing that the God whom I trust is much, much bigger and greater than any obstacle I may face. I will face my fear. I will stop running away from it and turn around. And when I am face-to-face and eye-to-eye with it I will grab the bull by its balls and make it scream surrender.

I surrender. I surrender to my great Destiny, knowing deep in my heart I am destined for excellence I am destined for greatness. Not mediocrity, not conformity. Not in arrogance but with the mantle of humility placed upon me. Because this is not about me. This is about humanity. I will persevere for the sake of humanity, who need men inflamed by passion that will ignite the hearts of the timid and fearful souls to push on and soar higher.

And I will do all this not ten years from now when I am free.
Not five years from now when I have the money.
Not one year from now when I am ready.
Not one month from now when all is steady.
Not one week from now when I know how.
Not even tomorrow because tomorrow is far from now.
I will live my dreams now and I will act now.

OMG!

aright, this is freaky. i was screwing around myspace when i came across a video in marc abaya's account that i looked for (really easily. haha) in youtube. (yeah, i kinda just clicked the link. bwahaha) anyway, it's a movie trailer called "elegie" (it's not even a word, i'm guessing. isn't it spelled elegy? but i'm pretty sure there is a good explanation to it that i don't know of course.) and marc abaya is IN IT! and not the lame idiotic extra person role type but a really major character! i know! but the really freaky part is, he can really act!

i was watching the trailer and i felt my nerves just clog up and the hair at the back of my neck standing! my jaws were separated the whole time and my eyes (i bet but i can't be sure) never blinked once. i literally froze in my seat and my hands were all over my face. i even had to learn how to download videos from youtube just so i have a copy on my desktop. the more i play the video, the creepier it gets. i mean marc abaya, screaming, crying, acting! for the love of all incarnation and all that's good in this world! efff! efff! i was thinking of telling you what the story is all about but i had the greater idea of just putting the video here, wow! haha.

on a (sad because i'm jealous) note, marc was with monica llamas, his "used to be" (i think) girlfriend who was the leading lady in this movie duh. and she's gorgeous! ahh! i feel really really jealous. but the heck with it! what-evo! watch it! watch it!

the pain. the misery.

i don't know what to feel anymore. hours ago i was so happy to see bands that i only dreamt of seeing but now i'm in so much pain because i can't be with these people who all look soo good and who are all soo good in the aspect that i love the most--- music.

it was the UP Centennial Fair's last night and that was the only night i went to of the whole seven nights when bands were all over the place. it so happened that no parking was able to get a slot in the line-up so i was able to make my way through a backstage pass. at first i was really super excited with the line-up because it almost had all the bands that i wanted--- kjwan, chicosci and pupil at the very most and all i had to say to myself was, "finally! oh my fuckin' god!"

no parking went ahead of all the cool bands, we were all jumping and they were good. and then some of the good stuff started pouring in the backstage. check these peeps out:

1. armi millare of up dharma down
2. lourd de vera of radioactive sago project.
3. jeje and guitarist of giniling festival. (suuureeeee)






4. louie talan of razorback
5. myrene academia, raymund marasigan and ebe dancel (you werent looking, i hate you!)
6. miggy chavez of chicosci (he looks so good)
7. mong alcaraz of chicosci (i don't know why but i feel mong's still so sad and i feel bad for this baby, he doesn't show it but definitely he still feels like shit.)



i have so many other pictures that i might or might not upload. check www.invadersss.multiply.com just in case. i may not upload them because i feel happy and soo bad at the same time. two reasons.

1. kjwan wasn't there. after chicosci, i felt like throwing up because i was jumping and screaming my lungs out but i didn't because i knew something bigger should be up. i was actually waiting for kjwan, but they kinda blew off the thing. i hope it's nothing bad but i really felt like shit. my sister said, "walang kjwan." and she kept patting my back because she knew i was so waiting for them. and i couldn't talk, there was so much expectation. i was spacing out almost 3/4 of the time last night until we got home and i fell asleep. i felt like crying. i know it's petty and pathetic but i wanted to see them and i wanted to watch their performance for so long already. i felt deprived and repressed and sad and... i can't blame them, i don't. i still love them, whether something came up or they just decided to ditch the gig. i will be expecting a million times more now that i didn't see them to see them.

2. i am not familiar with this feeling at the pit of my stomach, i want to be close to these people not because they're famous and good looking (or partially because they are good looking. SOME! because some are not but i still want to meet them. that's my alibi. but really), but because i know their music and i like their music and even their humor and i find them really cool. it's not like the i wanna meet and marry johnny depp kind of deal but the i wanna meet kjwan and other bands and be friends with them because i wanna be good friends and that's it. it would be lovely to meet johnny depp but i don't want his recognition even if he's the god of hollywood but these people i want the recognition because i know we have things in common and that recognition and friendship with them that's not in my dreams would really make me happy. :) and everytime i see these photos, i feel bad because that's all i'm gonna get, the inside job of a camera, memories. mere that.

i heart y.

or maybe i don't. so much. but what the heck, they made my valentines a little off track. i mean, they made it a day plus a bit special. we were to have zoo lec class and when we entered the room, each one had a note on their chairs, and the messages are really personal and not the general "HAPPY VALENTINES" deal. so we were all busy reading and wondering who did those and suddenly clyde comes up to the teacher's table and announces a free cut. we didn't believe him of course; we had to hear it from sir or if he doesn't come in, that's when we're sure it's a free cut. haha. (peace clyde!)

then, the guys come in with roses for everyone and a cake! awww. it's soo sweet. it maybe just a little act but it's really worth remembering. so we were all hugging and thanking them. they're the best really. cute. thanks loo, macoy, mikoy, sam, aa, clyde?, and sean. happy valentines! i heart y!

i'm pathetic, am i not just?

i saw this car yesterday in school on my way home. i know it's really nothing except for the plate number. it's only jun's initials. MJB? marinito jhoon balbuena? get it? haha. but really i saw him use those initials in the yahoo groups. alright so it's nothing also but what the heck? humor me!

anyway i've gone through great lengths to get those pictures. i had to pretend like i was reading a book/ browsing my camera pictures! i felt like shit and i look like a loser!

here's the story really:

i was walking towards gate 2.5 with a friend and then i spotted the plate number and my first thought was, "oh my god, jun's car!" i know, pathetic. i know, it might and it might not be but i was determined to really take a picture of that. so there. i had to go back and look for that car as soon as i parted with my friend and that's like on the gate already! i had to walk back around two minutes more! urgh! again, i am pathetic.

dive and trek

6:30am. i woke up today with massive muscle pains all over my body. i saw scratches, booboos red slash marks over my arms and legs last night, and i slumped really hard to a sleep as soon as i got back home from one tiring day from bauan, anilao, batangas. dive and trek was really hardcore. (whut?)

i looked around i saw my stuff scattered all over the place, most of them beside me on the bed and i was like shit i fell down even before i finished unpacking. then i looked back on the thick bamboo groves i kept avoiding, the enormous rocks that i passed on to get across a river, the fish!, the corals, the waters, the giant clams and that cute guy luis who sat in front of me in the bus. (what??) who the hell is that? man, i really don't know but i find him hot and cute and he speaks cute english. (how is english cute dammit?) anyway, don't mind that, he's gonna be gone inside my head in a while. haha.

mission1: trekking.

it was a long tiring road. wait, no road. it was a mountain with this effing river flowing down it that we had to cross. my shoes are half wet and i'm sweating like a smelly hog. really. well everyone was. haha. anyway, it really wasn't half bad, it wasn't bad at all really, i'm just not sure why some of my blockmates were all complaining and jigging their asses of this trekking thing when it was mighty cool. honestly, i really didn't have the hardest time of my life in that trek. it was more fun than hard. stupid screaming classmates.

mission2: diving.

skin diving was a blast but uh, it was the same stuff as palawan and sta ana and the rest of the other diving spots we've been to. so i really wasn't surprised with anything. and the hell with it, we were massively packed! yeah like a school of fish! dammit, all i saw were butts and more butts! fuckin' people don't wanna move out of the effing way! grr. it's like i wanna screan, "hey fucker, get your but of my mask! i wanna see fish for chrissakes!"

anyway that was the day, yeah. it was fun while it lasted. pretty much like everything else. but i gotta admit, i'd still have the same excitement if ever we get to do this kind of activity again. wahoo.

basketball players will do. (sagala ng mga sikat)

eman monfort. eric salamat. noy baclao.

these are the three names i never bothered to look up in our class list for fil12 section: mm. that's because they weren't really on our block. frankly, they were just dangling over the subject and teacher for a good grade.

but, boy all this stupid stuff changed during the SAGALA NG SIKAT (while and after). they were actors in the mini presentation and hell yeah, they were great. and to think i've already said all the freakin' bad words known to humanity because they couldn't attend practices before. but, holy cow they nailed it. they nailed it sooo bad i feel that they really are much more than tall guys (except eman. haha. peace) who shoot hoops.

on top of that, they are really good, kind people. i am surprised actually. i mean i didn't have assumptions of the opposite to begin with, but the idea is there waving hello at me. which made me feel like going to every single UAAP season next semester. haha. thanks and kuddos kids! we love ya!

ow and p.s. we fuckin' bagged everything! fuck! putangina!
1. Best Tableau
2. Best Presentation
3. Over-all Champion! were celebrating this coming monday! yeah!

p.p.s. we saw chris tiu again in his car mocking the three. hahaha. (actually i saw him 3 times this week already) but pssshhhaaww, who cares? ahhh!

i saw yan!

or should i say sir! yan. HAHA. yeah i did, today in ateneo. he was with a teacher (i think) and i just froze my ass staring at them walk in front of me. (ooopps. haha)

anyway, they were walking away from de la costa building to leong hall. and he has a bad leg. (i meant he was limping with a whole cast on his right leg. awwww.)

poor baby, what happened?? :D

leki

two thumbs up!

i had this time of my life when i really was a super fan of bamboo but then times change and bands come and go. however, i may not be currently super into the band, i have this certain degree of supreme love and respect for this band and i know that they do more than the music that they give out. i may not be as freakishly mad with them as i am with kjwan, but bamboo still sets up that high mood of love and heartfelt reference to them. i love bamboo and i look at them as a superband and their songs are mighty.

on top of that already known gratitude towards this band and their music, i recently discovered that they are part of this Unicef deal on having an outreach somewhere here in the philippines. i am indeed very proud of you bamboo! here's a preview: (but this is the only photo i could show you, i couldn't get any other. sorry)
if you wanna see more, click on bamboo under the bandanation element of this page and it'll link you to their site where more pictures are shown.

this guy's a genius

i got this from jorel's livejournal (?) account courtesy of youtube still. his name's andy mckee and boy he's a super acoustic master. just watch it. it's ssssooooo goood.

that L's in my forehead again!

this is junjun. marinito chow j-hoon balbuena of kjwan, kapatid and third world project. and he pretty much spins my world presently.

fuck it. i'm like a screaming sissy high school girl! dammit! ahhh! jun jun jun replied to me! ahh! well he replied to everyone who replied to him but what the hell do i care? he replied a personal and very sweet message! oh my goodness gracious incarnate! (what the fuck am i saying?) the hell with it, i don't care anymore! aaahhhh! jun i love you! or maybe i don't. or maybe i do. whatever fuck!

anyway, breathe breathe. i'm good now. ha. here's the thing that made my soooo happy day and maybe even life, haha. so he sent a mass e-mail in kjwan_online@yahoogroups.com. which went like this,

WhOW!! WhOW OOH WOAR!!!!

How are you guys na? NO MESSAGE at NO LOVE??? We are taking a long
break but that doesn mean you guys can stop SHOWING THIS NEWSGROUP
love! hahhahaahaha where have you guys been and what you been up to?
Hope you are well and at the best of whatever you are carving {;-p

Kjwan is broiling some really sweet tunes for our third album. We
demand your patience as we are in the lab putting together some good
for both Philippines and Asia for the next ALBUM.

Meanwhile you can hear Kjwan's commercial with LIPTON tea
practically everyday on the radio.

So yea we are not away and too far.

DROP US A FEW LINES OF KUDOS NAMAN!!!

All the love and all the peace

J to the HOON

so he just like missed everyone and decided to be pathetic and break the thick ice. and then i replied this, (for no particular reason) you know, i thought maybe he'd send something back. (loser)

awww. that's sweet. kuddos kids! me likey to see ya at UP centennial. and
ow, check out my video of kjwan and you. haha. yey.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ziKltJEFnUU

ow and we love you, don't fuss.

p.s. when did third world project happen? i like it.

so there. one week. two weeks. all eternity passed. and them there it was! there was a reply fuck! ahhh! shet shet! putang ina! ayan na! haha. (pardon the language, i know it's pathetic) ye ready? here it is,

I saw the video and I wanna CRY!!! LEKI thanks for being a kind heart
and a real sweet one. that really made my afternoon. Please wait for
the album it will be worth it. And if anyone here comes across LEKI.
One big hug. Love!! One LOVE!!

About TWP, stay tuned. Me and some producers have cooking up some
stuff. Really sticky!! Surprise.

Leki! MUAH!!

J HOON with tonnes of smiles!!

end of story. i'm dead now.

long weekend ahead

saturday. sunday. monday. yeah all part o' the hopefully disaster-free weekend. i have shit to do though. i'm planning to go through them as soon as possible but that plan is really JUST a plan. i also missed some other tons of stuff to do but i'm guessing that's on purpose haha. anyway to keep me on track, here they are:

1. get a sword for tai chi.
2. get a new pencil case.
3. make mama send money and snorkel.
4. waiver and payment for field trip.
5. review for zoo lec.
6. do math homework.
7. review math.
8. start for lit paper.
9. start for lit other shit.
10. finish life of pi.
11. attend job fair for no parking. eennggkk.
12. read english stuff.
13. answer english stuff.

so far that's all i can remember. i really didn't want to think any more than that though.